Wow. So much is happening in the cosmic geometries, manifesting as life here in the 3D. Things have likely felt a bit nuts - for me personally I can testify that yes, A FULL BOWL OF NUTS. For many of us that has shown up as sudden break-ups of partnerships (romantic and otherwise) and an underlying sense of deep and somewhat terrifying energetics that are hard to put into words. It's simply an extra-crazy time here on planet Earth. The good news is we are offered a bit of relief, starting right now. Today is the New Moon in Libra (exact at 5:11pm PST), the so-called 'Black Moon' as it is the second New Moon in a calendar month. And today that feels exactly right, a Black Moon indeed. The upside is the New Moon always signals the end of one or more cycles and beginning of the new.
The cycle that has just ended is largely about completed soul contracts, which naturally lends itself to 'break-ups'. When we move through these experiences consciously, by allowing ourselves to fully feel the depth of emotions while honoring the value and purpose of the partnership, we can come out the other side 'clean' and increased by the engagement. Emotions in the 3D tend to get very sticky and they can literally gunk-up our emotional field; we know this is happening when we get stuck on a single thought form, when we just can't seem to let something go. We are creatures that are meant to flow, which means we are built to allow emotions to move through us, like water, to completely immerse us and then flow on by. When we allow this, we can receive the jewel of the experience (there is always a jewel) and not amplify or prolong our suffering. When we resist the pain by distracting ourselves, ignoring it, getting angry, trying to change outcomes, etc., we are simply prolonging the inevitable, or worse yet, we are burying it deep within us where it will fester and eventually make us sick.
Another way we create suffering is to make the break-up mean something about us, rather than just staying present to the emotions. There can be a lot of wisdom and information in our emotions. If our beloved or partner has left us because they felt 'smothered', we have the opportunity to look at that with an open mind and heart: What am I doing that can be perceived as over-bearing or smothering? Am I allowing an open exchange of ideas, opinions, outcomes, etc.? Am I dominating the conversation/relationship? Do I take others' feelings and needs into account? In this way we can get real with ourselves, learn something about ourselves and grow from the experience. Or we can make it mean that we are Domineering, Uncaring, Selfish. And we can move forward through life believing this about ourselves - a sure-fire recipe for relentless suffering.
When moving through these emotionally charged experiences, self-care and self-love are crucial. We must stay present to our pain, bending our ear towards it, allowing it to express itself fully. This hurts and yet it is the fire we must walk through to reach the other side. So yes, sometimes we will be wailing and mourning, and we can support ourselves through this process in myriad ways. We can reach out to other beloveds who are really good at holding us (not talking us out of our pain, or bashing our ex, etc.). We can journal, take baths, do yoga, do breathwork, study, have fun, whatever our go-to's are for feeling AUTHENTICALLY better. (This means getting drunk to forget about it is not doing us any favors.) And most importantly, we hold ourselves in the process, knowing it is a spiral journey; one day we will feel good, like we're moving past it and the next day we will feel wrecked again. That's how the spiral works, it's not a linear process.
So we honor the relationship/partnership, we honor the ending of the relationship/partnership, we honor ourselves and our (now ex) partners, we honor the totality of our human journey. We remember to lean into the deep unseen Perfection that is always at hand, always revealing itself as our lives. Most of us do not have the perspective to pull back far enough to see the genius patterns of our existence; if we could, we would see that every single aspect of our lives is perfect, on purpose, carefully and specifically created by us, for us, so that our souls may grow and we may know ourselves more fully as Love and Wholeness. We can keep this knowing close, even as we feel the fullness of pain our human experience sometimes affords.
(For the record, my beloved and I did not split. There have been several deeply impactful breakups around me, one so close it may as well have been mine. And it brought up the unfinished business of every break-up I've experienced, a gift for which I am eternally grateful.)
So today is a very good day to set Intentions for the coming year. The New Moon is in Libra with a Venus influence. Libra rules the mirrored consciousness - our charge to create the world we desire inside of us first and the outer world will (must) reflect it back to us. And Venus is about Love; we have spent much of this year being schooled on how to give, receive and BE Love. So we are called to set Intentions around creating a world that reflects back to us all the Love we can possibly receive. (Thank you for this Dr. Michael Lennox.) We are called to create balanced relationships, where we are giving and receiving equally, where there is an open flow of alert attentiveness and appreciation without need. (As an aside - Receiving is a practice that is very worthy of our attention. A lot of us are really bad at it and don't even know it. Maybe investigate that for yourself.)
This weekend also marks the beginning of the Jewish High Holidays, the beginning of the Jewish New Year. It is the time of year we take stock of the previous cycle, allowing ourselves to see what worked and what didn't, how we fell short, how we hurt ourselves and others. We admit our failings and shortcomings, we ask for forgiveness, we make amends. And then we dream the coming year - a sweeter year - into being.
Here's to all the Sweetness and Love you can hold <3
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